Advertising Spot 1.
HACKETT: You got a problem here. you got seven actors
and only four "Mads." (HE GRABS HIS "MAD" FROM BERLE.)
BERLE: That's not my problem... All I know is I'm holding
up one of the "Mads." (HE GRABS HIS "MAD BACK.)
MERMAN: You mean you wouldn't give your "Mad" to a lady?
BERLE: To a lady maybe... not to you.
MERMAN SWINGS HER PURSE, CLOBBERS BERLE, AND GRABS THE "MAD" OUT OF
HIS HAND. THEN MICKY ROONEY AND CAESAR GET INTO IT, FIGHTING OVER
ROONEY: I think it's important that--
CAESAR: The imprtance of the importance is not important
WINTERS: Shut up. Gimme one of those (HE GRABS PHILL
SILVER'S "MAD," AND THEY TUSSEL WITH IT, ETC.)
Advertising Spot 2.
FREBERG: Try and se It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World! --Funnier
MAN: Wait a minute! I don't think we can get away
with saying that.
FREBERG: No, listen! I've seen both movies, and
Cleopatra is funny--don't get me wrong--but I have no say that Mad Mad
World is a little bit funnier.
MAN: Yeah but--
FREBERG: Spencer Tracy, Milton Berle, Ethel Merman, Sid
MAN: Hold it--
FREBERG: ...Jonathan Winters, Phil Silvester, Mickey Rooney,
Buddy Hackett. Every great comedian alive is in it.
MAN: It sounds hilarious, but we can't say that it's "funnier
FREBERG: Okay then, how about this: "almost as funny as
MAN: Well, that might be al right.
Above Script taken directly from "It Only Hurts When I Laugh" page